Together is Better

Upon getting up one day, I was mad, mad at my husband. Super mad. I did not like the habit of his to be late, very late or a little late, but late anyhow.

I preferred Princess Diana’s way. She could be late because of who she was, but she was always on time or earlier. Early is on time, on time is late, and late is unacceptable. This is a way to show love and gives the message, “I care about you.”

When my daughter Diesa was at Marist college in Poughkeepsie, part of the Red Foxes basketball team, they had a rigorous training schedule. They had to be on the court or the gym at 5 am, which meant be there 15 minutes earlier for warm up. If they were late, they had to do push-ups. This has stayed with her for her whole life. She is always early for appointments.

Of course, Dietrich’s mom (Oma) knew of her son’s habit of being late, because whenever we were invited to her favorite restaurant, or any other place, it was hard to make it on time. One day Oma noticed I was frustrated and gave me some advice: “In these circumstances take your purse and go. Do not wait for him.” Nice advice when your mother-in-law takes your side!

We were living in the woods one hour from Vienna. That morning, Dietrich was preparing to go to Vienna to teach at the Vienna International University, and I was supposed to go to the city with him. As usual things got scrambled and hurried, and I knew my husband was going to speed all the way to the capital, leaving me in a state of anxiety.

So that morning I took my purse and went. I not only took my purse, but I took the car as well, so he was left without transportation. He had to walk to the train station, change trains and get the subway. He would not be on time for his class for sure, and because of that, he was very mad as well.

Meanwhile I was climbing in the Vienna woods with the car, almost surprised by my actions. But I did not feel comfortable with the negative emotions stirring in my heart.

I was climbing up to the famous Hohe Wand, fuming all the way there. It is about 1000 meters high with a breathtaking view well loved by the Viennese for weekends or holidays.

I started walking away through the evergreens, trying to pray for the day, but was not doing so well. Then I found a hut, as you always do when you go through the paths in the Vienna woods. I decided to have some breakfast there. It was still in the early hours of the morning, so no guests were there yet.

I started feeling awkward as the owner was staring at me not understanding my German. He was wondering, “Why is she here by herself at this early hour, alone when everybody still in bed, and she can’t even speak the language.”

The breakfast that day was not tasting so good. In fact, it was tasting almost bad. There was no flavor, no warmth to it. It tasted cold and unappealing. I was starting to feel all alone, from lonely to miserable. Was it worth all the drama? Could there be another way? I was feeling I was right and my husband was wrong. But is it not that we can let the right go, for the sake of peace?

I was not too proud of myself. I had to make a plan to become smarter than him, because deep inside I never wanted to fight. I like harmony and peace. So that day I made up my mind that I would say the time of all my appointments will be half an hour earlier. I will change the time with Dietrich and then relax and still be on time for my schedule.

Let’s not react with toxic emotions. I never liked to fight with my husband. Neither did he. The hardships and difficulties made us grow. To attain a better character and lifestyle we should learn to harmonize with each other and always make peace. Together is better.

Elisabeth Seidel

The Love We Share

Because my husband and I were so close during our lifetime, we used to share everything; we talked a lot; we were the other half of each other.

So of course, I continue now to share many things with him since he passed more than 2 years ago.

I talk to him while looking at his picture, I write letters to him. Sometimes he answers me like a deep intuition, an emotion, a subtle presence, a certainty, a love sentence coming at me out of somewhere like the other day. Then joy comes into my heart as a river of peace, a sense of protection and affirmation of the eternal.

Is it not the cherished hope of humanity that we live forever? That there is life after life?

I am presently in my hometown in the French Alps, a small, pretty town that you can still find in the middle of the mountains. My friend Annick owns a bookstore gift store there, and she has been carrying my husband’s books. The other day as I was visiting her to inquire if she needed more books, she said yes. I was surprised that she could sell English books in this remote place.

There was a man in the store choosing some books to buy and hearing our conversation he asked me if I was an author. I answered, mainly my husband but I did publish my memoirs. We continued chatting and he gave me his card. His name was Thierry and he was a medium!

Soon enough he said my husband, Dietrich, came from the other side to greet us. Thierry and my husband started a conversation that he reported to me. Dietrich was continuing his work there, and he said that where he was, everything is amplified, and in a sense has more power. They seemed in a good conversation with each other. At the end Thierry bought one of my husband’s books, “Eternal Life in the Spirit World” co-authored by Dietrich Seidel and Jennifer Tanabe. I was a little surprised by this encounter, but as Thierry said: Nothing happens by accident.

As I was exiting the bookstore, jokingly I said to my husband: “Dietrich, you forgot to give me a hug!”

A few days later I received an e-mail from my friend Elizabeth Kiedler (also a medium) and she sent me a message from Dietrich.

“To my beloved wife Elisabeth (that’s me) much love and blessings. I hold you tight in my arms forever. I will never let go. Dietrich.”

This is the type of conversation we have together, with a little help from our friends. For us it is so natural to continue our relationship because of the love we shared.

If you did not read our books yet you can order them here.

Hope you are all well. I love receiving your news and or feedback. I love you all and miss you too. Let’s all build a world of true love and peace. God bless you.

Mom! Be Nice to Dad

“Mom, be nice to Dad!” My daughter responded, one day after I was using a sharp tongue towards my husband. It came to me as a surprising shock, as I was not even aware of my attitude. Sometimes too critical, or impatiently babbling something too fast or inappropriate. It stopped me in my tracks and I could reflect on my attitude.

I was not nice. To my husband.

I had a lot of reasons why. I could enumerate all of them. In order of importance.
But in the end, it does not matter the reasons why.
What does matter in the end is if we could love anyway.

Being always nice and pleasant speaking, and reconciling and agreeable. This is an art. An art of living together.
Responding in kind when we know the other one is wrong, or we think he is. Forgiving and going over the hurt of squabbling.
In the end it does not matter.
What matter is if we could love, anyway.

I have been doing a lot of thinking lately, reviewing different situations in my life where I was not nice, and changing them in my mind to the right response.

It is said that when you go to the spirit world, you first review your life. You experience how the other person felt when you were not nice, by your actions and behavior, and also when you were nice, what pleasant emotions you have given to others. This will determine the region where you will be residing in your eternal home.

Other situations were not closed well the way I would have wanted, which means with ultimate true love. So, in my mind I process them, asking for forgiveness, and also asking my husband from the other side of the veil to work at it. We can continue our relationship between the two worlds to make it in the end the perfect love we always wanted. Let’s be nice to each other.

Elisabeth Seidel

Say No to Divorce

This morning I asked my friend why did his wife wanted to divorce him, such a fine man like him. He said, she told him that she did not receive enough love.

In our case we women always want more. In this case, less is not best but more is good. More love and more attention. More hugs. More cherished words, more time. All of the above. Love unconditionally. Not once but every day. A few times every day. How can this happen in the fast-paced world of today?

Well, when love gets going, is given, received and given back, there is so much more energy, so much more purpose in one’s life. The tiredness goes away, the suffering in other areas of one life diminishes. It is a big dose of health, vitamins and pick me up. True love can cure all, I always heard.

I was very demanding to my husband. How could he cope with me? Many times I asked, please listen to me, to my story, to my pain with so and so. It was serious. He had to drop whatever he was doing and give me immediate attention. Now I am so eternally grateful for those moments. True love was a therapy to feel better.

Every one of us has to find a true love therapy which make us feel better. This New Year let’s proclaim a love therapy where we are the invitation to make someone feel better, more loved, more precious, more needed. “It is in giving that we receive.”

Always say no to divorce.

Elisabeth Seidel

Die Große Liebe

As I was visiting my 97 years young mother-in-law in Vienna, I was surprised that she was still reading books. I thought she was only looking through magazines or mainly watching tv as entertainment if she was not on an excursion, or playing dominos.

But to my surprise she was reading a book from the American author Pearl Buck, and the title was “Die Große Liebe,” means “Le Grand Amour” or “The Great Love.”

Wow! She is 97 and reading love stories! I realized this ideal of ours never dies. At 100 you can still dream about love, true love, the one and only. This quest never ever ends and reading about it becomes so exciting, interesting and fulfilling.

I told Oma, I know who is my great love for ever and ever. And she had me tell her again and again my encounter with Dietrich, her son, which was love at first sight. And how it stayed this way during our 40 years of married life and beyond.

We are born this way that love is part of our inner self, and the most interesting topic, even when you reach 97.

To keep a true love is great work. If you did not find it yet, do not despair. One day every one of us will find their true, unique and forever love. This I believe.

Let’s spread more love around us, more loving words, more smiles, more random acts of kindness, and specially if someone attacks you let’s give back in kindness. We are changing ourselves so that a world of heart and love will come about.

In the photo below, you can see me with my beloved Dietrich, Oma, and Dietrich’s sister Gisela at the famous Prater in Vienna.

Prater Vienna

The Killer of Love

This month I would like to address a more serious topic.

As I was browsing through a website called HighNoon.org, I was reading that a high school student was wearing a tee shirt that said:

LIVE FOR LOVE.

PORN KILLS LOVE.

And this fact stirred a lot of discussions among the students.

Addiction is fueled in secrecy, and conquered in a community.

THE KILLER OF LOVE

The average age at which students start watching porn is eleven years old, yes 11. There are claims that the pornography industry is directly targeting children.

My cousin Karine, a high school teacher, said to me, every day at school I see the damage that cell phones and internet do to our kids, this is why my husband and I choose not to buy cell phones for our own children and very much limit their use of the Internet.

Those dark forces out there are destroying our youth and our families, and must be conquered if we want to live a happy and fulfilling life with real love. Those addicted to porn cannot anymore have a functional intimate relationship with their spouse.

FIGHT FOR LOVE

Protection of the family is one of the most important tasks to save a sick society. Porn addiction destroy marriages and put people into deep depression and violent behavior. We need to heal all addictions and become functional again. There is a similarity between the illegal drug industry and the pornography industry.

BELIEVE IN LOVE

HighNoon.org” and other websites are developing to help people heal. Like “FightTheNewDrug.org” or “EndSexualExploitation.org” and “YourBrainOnPorn.com”.

I pray for the healing of America and our own family. Let’s heal ourselves that we can heal others. One day all of us will find the true love we are longing for.

Elisabeth Seidel

Making a World of Peace One Family at a Time

In his article The Significance of the family for World Peace, my husband Dietrich quoted Mitch Albom saying “The family is the only secure foundation. You must have the support and love of a family or you don’t have much at all.”

Looking back at my relationship with my husband, I had many days when I was feeling in great agony. Those were the days when we had a fight. A volcano would erupt from time to time.

Dietrich’s Chinese Zodiac sign is the Ram (Lamb). He is extremely patient. My sign is the Rooster, and I am extremely impatient. When reading about compatibility between the Ram and the Rooster it says the relationship is most difficult but not impossible – the Ram does not know what to make of the Rooster.

So, we had to tackle so many impossible situations. My specialty was to erupt quickly; for him nothing would really trigger him. If I was hurt, unhappy, upset and the like I would not talk to him for hours. But I was in very deep agony. All my energy, zest for life, raison de vivre, joie de vivre, purpose and goals were gone. I was most miserable.

Then I noticed the same pattern always coming from him, “We need to talk.” To show my dissatisfaction I totally refused at first, letting out some more steam and eruptions. But truly I was not happy in this state. No matter what, we had to work it out. We needed to forgive each other and reconcile and start anew.

Then I realized we needed to talk. He always left me plenty of space and a listening ear to digest all my arguments, but he was always the first to say “I did not mean to hurt you. This was not my intention. Please forgive me.” Then I could open up to him again, letting go of my anger.

The point was that both of us we were absolutely anchored in God and in our belief that we must work out our differences to be a happy couple. And we would never let go of that.

To conclude, when there is a fight one of us has to say “We need to talk” and apologize, saying “It was not my intention to hurt you. Please forgive me.” Lend a listening ear and a forgiving heart and conclude it with a deep hug. Hugs are warm, cozy, bringing the affection needed for everyday life.

True love is not impossible. In fact, it is our raison de vivre, our joie de vivre.

Much love to all of you.
Your friend Elisabeth