One of my husband’s colleagues at the end of his life, when he knew his days were numbered, decided to visit and reconcile with everyone he held a grudge against or had difficult feelings or resentment towards. Those people he did not want to speak to because anger and upset feelings would arise: Was he maltreated? Was he jealous? Did he failed to seek harmony and peace and love, to go the extra mile and go over the hurt coming from the others?
What he knew was that he was not going to take his house or savings or car with him, and he would be separated for some time from his spouse and family and friends.
He knew like a certainty deep down in his guts that he needed repentance, and most of all, to forgive and reconcile. This is why he went and visited many people. He did not want to break Heavenly laws. He wanted to be clear and free before God.
This action brought calm to his restless heart and a sense of wellbeing; no need to take heavy, ugly, spiritual baggage with him.
Myself, I fought my spiritual battles with numerous family members to achieve peace through service. I try to love my in-laws as much as my husband loves them or more. I kept reminding him to visit, to call, to free his schedule for them. One time I felt rejected by everyone, but Dietrich’s sister, Gisela, and I became best friends through working our way through differences to reconciliation. My own brother deeply hurt me. I repented and cried to God about this point.
Family conflict started at the beginning of history and multiplies to this day. The one who includes God, our Heavenly Parent, will have a better chance to resolve conflicts. We will have the power to forgive all: Koreans and Japanese, French and Germans, blacks and whites, and others.
God will give us direction, grace and power and forgiveness, as long as we are seeking Him. In God we trust.
May God bless you and your family.
Your friend Elisabeth
family
The Love that Makes us Heal
On one occasion my husband Dietrich had to be hospitalized, because of different health issues. My daughter Diesa, to whom her dad is her hero, decided to fast seven days for his complete recovery. This is a long time to go without food, only water. One has to prepare mentally for that. It is a big enterprise for the body to adjust, and the mind to decide why we are fasting, and what will be the desired result.
On the last day of the fast, to show their support, Jessa and Nurie, two of Diesa’s friends, joined her in her offering. That very day Dietrich totally recovered.
I will always remember the support given to us in time of need and difficulty. Friendship is beautiful, as is the special love between father and daughter.
On another occasion, as Diesa was preparing to go to Haiti for a special program for young women, she flew to Vienna, Austria, with her brother Christopher to spend Christmas time with us. Two days before Christmas, their father had a stroke, turning our life around. Diesa stayed an extra two weeks with us before flying directly to Haiti. Again, she fasted three days for her beloved dad.
Dietrich recovered, but it was painful, long, arduous recovery. But he did recover.
I believe fasts, prayers, good deeds, restitutions, help the healing of body and soul, bringing credits to our spiritual accounts.
We might be sick because of physical causes, but also through inheritance from past generations.
I realized my mom’s suffering from anxiety was passed on to me. She had a tough life. Her first child was stillborn. It was during World War Two and the midwife was drunk, she told me. So, as she was carrying me, she must have been full of anxiety.
I remember my medical doctor Dr Teubl telling me we might inherit problems from past generations, but we can heal everything during one generation.
I believe also that love heals everything. My husband was for me a healer of my soul. He was also a healer to my dad. He was also a healer for many people during his lifetime.
The fasts, prayers, and love people bestowed on Dietrich added years to his life and made him feel better, treasured, and healed.
Let’s heal each other of our burdens so that the world becomes a world we truly love, and let’s love each other with the love which come from our Heavenly Parent.
Elisabeth Seidel
The Families who are Healing the Divide
My cousin Michele from Paris married a black American man after World War 2. Her beloved at that time was stationed in France as part of the American forces.
The photo below shows Michele at age 19 when she met her future husband, Belton, in Paris in 1955.
I remember her dad, Pierre my favorite uncle, was a bit shocked that his only and unique daughter was leaving her country and her family to go and have a new life in America with someone from another race.
True love is colorblind. I believe my cousin and all my friends who are from interracial marriages are healing the wounds created by centuries of pain, slavery, misfortune, injustice and the like. If love abides with these couples, truly their children are stunning. They are special in God’s sight. They are most beautiful, because it was the love of their parents that created them. Because they overcome it all. The pain became forgiveness. Love does not dwell in the weaknesses of the other, but covers the imperfections and the resentment.
Myself, I married a man of German descent, the enemy of France. The priest in my hometown, Father Durieux, said to me:
“I had 14 brothers and sisters and my grandparents were living with us up in the mountain. That was a huge table of 19 people over dinner. The Germans came and burned our house. This was the first time I saw my father cry. One German soldier said to him, witnessing the scene, ‘I am ashamed to be a German.’”
This soldier repented for his country. He was so sorry that this beautiful family of 15 kids were left with nothing. My husband also repented publicly in my hometown for the crimes of his ancestors.
I am also so sorry to see the anger and unrest everywhere in America today.
We also need to repent for things left unsolved. This is the time where we make the wrongs right. We say: “We are sorry, please forgive us, we love you.”
It is the same in the family, especially if our marriage is for healing our nations. We say to our partner: “I am sorry if I hurt you, please forgive me. I love you.”
I remember her dad, Pierre my favorite uncle, was a bit shocked that his only and unique daughter was leaving her country and her family to go and have a new life in America with someone from another race.
Today all my love goes to these most special families who are healing the divide. World peace through ideal families. Is it not so?
Elisabeth Seidel
When the Family Is Well, All Is Well
When I was very sick one day, and could not get out of bed, my son, a young teenager at that time, made a soup for me with all kind of fresh and colorful vegetables. It reminded me of my mom’s vegetable soup from the mountains of the French alps. Her soup was the best soup one can ever have, because her garden grew in idyllic nature and was tended every day with utmost sincerity.
So, the son of the house was making a soup for me. From my bed, I was already rejoicing. I was surprised he could cut the vegetables perfectly, and put together all these delicious products of the earth in a big pot to simmer.
I remember the taste of that hot soup, made with all my son’s heart and attention, and care. Is it not so, that we always remember things which are offered with love?
The soup tasted so good. Spiritual elements can go into the food when it is prepared with good feelings. The spiritual elements, the love, in the soup went deep into my bones, reviving me from feverish slumber, and starting the healing process. The soup really helped me get out of bed that day.
This is a good memory of my son’s filial piety.
Every day let us make good memories from our life. And if we have none or just a few, then we need to rewrite our life stories.
Always with love, your friend Elisabeth
Margaretha Vesely, my beautiful mother-in-law
To my most beautiful, most distinguished, most dignified most beloved mother-in-law Margaretha Vesely. Thank you for your exemplary meaningful life. Truly I learned a lot from you.
One: how to be always cheerful, grateful and happy despite all circumstances. Every morning you put on a beautiful dress, a tasteful necklace, and your smile was on as part of your getting dressed I never saw you upset, irritated or angry.
Two: You were always generous with everyone. You invited all family members to join you at your favorite Viennese restaurant Oberlaa, as often as they wanted, and as their schedules permitted. You often extended this invitation to extended family and friends. You made sure everyone was ordering sweets for deserts, topped with “schlagobers,” Austrian whipped cream, and delicious coffee you can find only there.
You always gave a very large tip to the servers. You did it with love and care. So, every time you entered there, you were received like a VIP. You and OPA always bought newspapers from the refugees giving tips as well, even if you had already the paper at home.
Three: You made it through the war. Being married at that time with a German officer, your family too suffered during this time. There was not enough to eat, so you had to go to the country side to work in the fields in order to feed your children.
Four: There were other shockwaves during your lifetime, but you went through it all gracefully and courageously, always keeping your smile, your inner beauty.
How hard it has been for you when your beloved son departed for America. He was still very young, and you could not see him for seven years. For a mother it was heartbreaking. I understand you. Then your son Dietrich came back with a French wife and you could not make sense of it all. In the past French and German and Austrian nations were enemies.
Five: At the end somehow, we could all love each other, overcoming any distance or barrier. Today I declare you as the best mother-in-law and your son Dietrich was the best husband I could ever have.
We all love you Oma, and happy journey into your next life.
Your daughter-in-law, Elisabeth
About Catherine
My friend Christine shared with me about her sister Catherine who passed away from leukemia when she was 19. Christine herself was 20 at that time, and all their life together they had been very close. At school they would find surprises in their backpacks from the other sibling, like special cookies or treat, a note. So their loving relationship could continue beyond this world.
One week before Catherine passed, she had a spiritual experience. She said a being of light came and held her in his arms, saying that her suffering would be gone very soon. It could have been Jesus or an angel who helps human beings transition to the other world.
This morning on Mother’s Day Catherine appeared to Christine wishing her a happy day.
I asked Christine, how does she appear to you? She said, like in a dream, but it is real.
In fact, also her ancestors, like her father and mother, are present for all the birthdays of each family member. Christine sees them happy to celebrate together.
Soon those two worlds will become one and we will spend time with each other as we wish. That will be the beginning of the Kingdom of Heaven, where everything that has been separated will be unified again. Like our mind and body, difficult relationships will become harmonious, peace will come in divided countries, and parents and children will find loving relationships again. I am longing for this world.
Elisabeth Seidel
Mom! Be Nice to Dad
“Mom, be nice to Dad!” My daughter responded, one day after I was using a sharp tongue towards my husband. It came to me as a surprising shock, as I was not even aware of my attitude. Sometimes too critical, or impatiently babbling something too fast or inappropriate. It stopped me in my tracks and I could reflect on my attitude.
I was not nice. To my husband.
I had a lot of reasons why. I could enumerate all of them. In order of importance.
But in the end, it does not matter the reasons why.
What does matter in the end is if we could love anyway.
Being always nice and pleasant speaking, and reconciling and agreeable. This is an art. An art of living together.
Responding in kind when we know the other one is wrong, or we think he is. Forgiving and going over the hurt of squabbling.
In the end it does not matter.
What matter is if we could love, anyway.
I have been doing a lot of thinking lately, reviewing different situations in my life where I was not nice, and changing them in my mind to the right response.
It is said that when you go to the spirit world, you first review your life. You experience how the other person felt when you were not nice, by your actions and behavior, and also when you were nice, what pleasant emotions you have given to others. This will determine the region where you will be residing in your eternal home.
Other situations were not closed well the way I would have wanted, which means with ultimate true love. So, in my mind I process them, asking for forgiveness, and also asking my husband from the other side of the veil to work at it. We can continue our relationship between the two worlds to make it in the end the perfect love we always wanted. Let’s be nice to each other.
Elisabeth Seidel
Say No to Divorce
This morning I asked my friend why did his wife wanted to divorce him, such a fine man like him. He said, she told him that she did not receive enough love.
In our case we women always want more. In this case, less is not best but more is good. More love and more attention. More hugs. More cherished words, more time. All of the above. Love unconditionally. Not once but every day. A few times every day. How can this happen in the fast-paced world of today?
Well, when love gets going, is given, received and given back, there is so much more energy, so much more purpose in one’s life. The tiredness goes away, the suffering in other areas of one life diminishes. It is a big dose of health, vitamins and pick me up. True love can cure all, I always heard.
I was very demanding to my husband. How could he cope with me? Many times I asked, please listen to me, to my story, to my pain with so and so. It was serious. He had to drop whatever he was doing and give me immediate attention. Now I am so eternally grateful for those moments. True love was a therapy to feel better.
Every one of us has to find a true love therapy which make us feel better. This New Year let’s proclaim a love therapy where we are the invitation to make someone feel better, more loved, more precious, more needed. “It is in giving that we receive.”
Always say no to divorce.
Elisabeth Seidel
Die Große Liebe
As I was visiting my 97 years young mother-in-law in Vienna, I was surprised that she was still reading books. I thought she was only looking through magazines or mainly watching tv as entertainment if she was not on an excursion, or playing dominos.
But to my surprise she was reading a book from the American author Pearl Buck, and the title was “Die Große Liebe,” means “Le Grand Amour” or “The Great Love.”
Wow! She is 97 and reading love stories! I realized this ideal of ours never dies. At 100 you can still dream about love, true love, the one and only. This quest never ever ends and reading about it becomes so exciting, interesting and fulfilling.
I told Oma, I know who is my great love for ever and ever. And she had me tell her again and again my encounter with Dietrich, her son, which was love at first sight. And how it stayed this way during our 40 years of married life and beyond.
We are born this way that love is part of our inner self, and the most interesting topic, even when you reach 97.
To keep a true love is great work. If you did not find it yet, do not despair. One day every one of us will find their true, unique and forever love. This I believe.
Let’s spread more love around us, more loving words, more smiles, more random acts of kindness, and specially if someone attacks you let’s give back in kindness. We are changing ourselves so that a world of heart and love will come about.
In the photo below, you can see me with my beloved Dietrich, Oma, and Dietrich’s sister Gisela at the famous Prater in Vienna.
Making a World of Peace One Family at a Time
In his article The Significance of the family for World Peace, my husband Dietrich quoted Mitch Albom saying “The family is the only secure foundation. You must have the support and love of a family or you don’t have much at all.”
Looking back at my relationship with my husband, I had many days when I was feeling in great agony. Those were the days when we had a fight. A volcano would erupt from time to time.
Dietrich’s Chinese Zodiac sign is the Ram (Lamb). He is extremely patient. My sign is the Rooster, and I am extremely impatient. When reading about compatibility between the Ram and the Rooster it says the relationship is most difficult but not impossible – the Ram does not know what to make of the Rooster.
So, we had to tackle so many impossible situations. My specialty was to erupt quickly; for him nothing would really trigger him. If I was hurt, unhappy, upset and the like I would not talk to him for hours. But I was in very deep agony. All my energy, zest for life, raison de vivre, joie de vivre, purpose and goals were gone. I was most miserable.
Then I noticed the same pattern always coming from him, “We need to talk.” To show my dissatisfaction I totally refused at first, letting out some more steam and eruptions. But truly I was not happy in this state. No matter what, we had to work it out. We needed to forgive each other and reconcile and start anew.
Then I realized we needed to talk. He always left me plenty of space and a listening ear to digest all my arguments, but he was always the first to say “I did not mean to hurt you. This was not my intention. Please forgive me.” Then I could open up to him again, letting go of my anger.
The point was that both of us we were absolutely anchored in God and in our belief that we must work out our differences to be a happy couple. And we would never let go of that.
To conclude, when there is a fight one of us has to say “We need to talk” and apologize, saying “It was not my intention to hurt you. Please forgive me.” Lend a listening ear and a forgiving heart and conclude it with a deep hug. Hugs are warm, cozy, bringing the affection needed for everyday life.
True love is not impossible. In fact, it is our raison de vivre, our joie de vivre.
Much love to all of you.
Your friend Elisabeth